Off to the Fano Carnival this week.  The oldest in Italy, and therefore the world.

We stopped for a sea food lunch at Senegalia on the way. The fish was fantastic as always, although a group of feasting pensioners, were rather raucous. The source of their high spirits was a small shrine of Belusconi and Ruby (his bunga-bunga companion) which, one of their number explained, they were relying on it to keep them safe as they walked across the sea to Albania. It is nice to know that Belusconi is as much a joke here as abroad.  Apparently the pensioners  go out together each Sunday,-  forget the family, have a good time.  Sounds like a good plan

The satire continued with the fabulous carnival floats in Fano. Fat locust bankers fiddled whilst stealing the children, dressed as grain, from an army of honest worker ants. A little squirming Belusconi was impaled on the spear of Fini, speaker of the lower house. A float showing all the iconic italian brands, Gucci, Bialetti, Ferrero Rocce which are now manufactured in China.  ‘Why ambassador, with these imports you are really killing us’.

It is a shame that the humour and satire was largely lost on the crowd, who could only think of confectionary. The important thing about the Fano carnival is they throw sweets – and not just your usual boiled sweets – they throw bacci (chocolate kisses), kitkats and sometimes whole panetone. I do think they should take them out of the packets first.

During a particularly wet February someone realised that the way to go was to turn their umbrella upside down.  The result now is a ceiling of upturned umbrellas whilst below them, in the shadows, thin chidren scramble for scraps.

Umbrellas are always dangerous. Turned upside down, and poked  in the direction of the flying sweets, they are on a collision course with any child’s eye for 100 yards. I was about to get all uppity about the injustice of it all and was planning an umbrella sabotage strategy when Maisie was caught just above the eye by a flying bacci.  As I clucked about the growing swelling and health and safety I couldn’t help thinking of the 70’s classic

“.. the concrete hardened crust
of a stale pork pie
caught him in the eye,
and Ernie bit the dust”